"I HAD ONE SPIRITUAL WIFE LAST YEAR BUT SHE STARTED DOUBLE CROSSING ME WITH MY BEST FRIEND"

Have you ever been in a debate where you thought you knew everything but in the end it leaves you more confused? Well, I just had one. 

Someone posed a question; Do spiritual husbands or wives exist? For a long time, I have been hearing about this topic but haven't really tried to think so deeply about it until now. 

A lot of people believe spiritual husbands or wives exist. These are evil spirits that come in the night to make love to men and women in their sleep, with a few exceptional cases where the victim can actually see these demons. 

Advocates for these marriages between humans and spirits believe that some people's progress in life is hindered because of the same spiritual marriages. These spirits make it very hard for a person who is married to them to progress either professionally or economically.

There are many other people who do not believe that such marriages exist. To them this is just crap meant to hoodwink a few hapless victims. This is why one of the contributors to the above mentioned debate in which I was involved jokingly said, “I had one spiritual wife last year but she started double crossing me with my best friend. Now they are happily married.”

I have just discovered that I am one of those who are skeptical about such marriages and I will try to explain why.

You have probably seen or heard of a pastor telling people that they are married to spirits. In some cases, after the pastor prays for the victim, the spirit itself starts speaking through the person, proclaiming that it is the husband (or wife in a few cases) of the person it possesses. 

I remember seeing a TV programme last year where a woman who was possessed with such a spirit, was being prayed for by a pastor.  The evil spirit inside her was speaking through her. The spirit said he is the husband of the woman but the woman does not follow his instructions so he has decided to punish her.

When the pastor asked what it has done to punish the woman, the spirit replied that it has stunted her husband's business which cannot progress. It also said that it has caused peace to flee from the woman's marriage by causing her and the husband to constantly argue over nothing.

If you have paid proper attention to the above, you will notice that the spirit is acknowledging that the woman is married to another man, who in this case is a human. At the same time, it says that the woman is his (the spirit's) wife. How logical is that? 

Now if the spirit was truly the husband to that woman, why was it still calling her human partner “her husband”? 

I somehow think many pastors have been misled by these talking spirits and in turn they have also misled a lot of people on this topic. They take what the spirit tells them as the truth. Just because the spirit says she is my wife that does not mean she is truly married to that spirit. The spirit may just be lying and saying that because that is what it wants you to believe. Unfortunately many people have fallen for that trick. 

I may be right and I may be wrong but this is just what I think. Some pastors may even deliberately be taking advantage of some people by making their situations seem hopeless with this scary theory.  Instead of rightfully telling them that they are simply possessed with a demon, they want to make it sound more sensational.  

If a person dreams that he is eating some food, this is also considered by some people as an initiation into some evil scheme. Some people could have been initiated in this way but this does not mean every dream in which someone is eating food must be considered an initiation. 

The bible acknowledges that demons exist but if you follow the bible’s definition of marriage and what it entails or how it should be done, you cannot definitely say a spiritual marriage makes sense.

No one can just come and take a woman by force and proclaim that she is his wife without her consent. If you did that in this world you would definitely be met by the full force of the law. What I see here is simply the abuse or misapplication of the word "marriage". 

If it is possible for a spirit to have sex with you, that still does not make it a marriage. It is just like having sex with any other person you meet anywhere. It is either called fornication or adultery. Having sex with someone does not automatically make the two of you husband and wife. 

A lot of pastors who are preaching about the existence of spiritual marriages sometimes even contradict themselves. How can a pastor who clearly saw me marrying my wife, and he sees us together every Sunday in church, all of a sudden come to my wife and tell her that she is married to a marine spirit? 

"Excuse me pastor, can't you see me sitting over here with our kids?"

I would say such a person is not even fit to conduct any marriage rites because he lacks some understanding. A pastor is the last person not to know that if someone is married to another person, there is no way that person can be married to a second person especially without her knowledge or consent of any kind from anyone.

It is the same as Mrs A having an affair with Mr C while she is married to Mr B. When the pastor gets to find out that Mrs A is having an affair, he cannot go to her and tell her that she is married to Mr C simply because they had sex, and especially if that sex was in a dream. Even if Mr C came and told him that Mrs A is his wife, the pastor cannot condone it because the pastor knows that Mrs A is already married to Mr B. 

He should rightly call it adultery. The same is what is supposed to be the case with a woman who is being troubled by an evil spirit. That woman is simply possessed by a spirit and not married to it. 

Some of these pastors will even call you Mrs Tembo but a little later he will come and tell you that you are married to a spirit just because the spirit said to him “she is my wife …blah blah blah”. Have you forgotten that the devil is a liar?

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